ON BEING HUMAN

For more than a decade now, I’ve been diving deep into the waters of personal development and self-actualization. I thought, assumed, quite unconsciously that there was a state were a bunch of uncomfortable emotions and disfunctional behaviors wouldn’t be there, were clarity would surround my decisions and an orderly grounded life would be my default mode.

This was a very alive illusion back in the beggining of my twenties, I poured into it, time, energy and money. Self-discipline was never a problem and finding and hiring mentors was sparely used.

Still defeat on this matter has been what I’ve found. The more I pushed the worse I felt. How could someone so focused, so commited not be able to make it?

Well, I’ll tell you my conclusion of it. I was playing the wrong game.

The idea that you’ll ever attain an idealized self is a commonly shared illusion but that has nothing to do with being human, which is what. you are wether your ego mind likes it or not.

The ego has such an easy time imagining what it things would be perfect. What it things you should attain for. If you believe it you are doomed. You’ll be self-rejecting yourself, cutting yourself off from the universal energy that’s all around us and from your greatest power.

Actually to access your greatest, deeper power, you have no other choice but to accept yourself, fully. You have no other choice but to be human.

This, contrary to what many might fear, do not create stagnation, stagnation can only be created if you held a new image of yourself (the one you think is the “accepting self”) and try to stick to it. If you are truly accepting youreslf you’ll notice that yourself is in constant motion. There’s something, a being, an intelligence that has a life of it’s own, and that something when you are not messing with it by rejecting who you are, evolve in a way that’s right for you.

And that' something is your essence, it’s who you are and your greatest power.

At the begining of the year I went to North Carolina in a beautiful house right in front of the ocean. I had the priviledge to attend to a small intensive with a group of people mostly close to their 70s with who I consider tot be the greatest psychoterapist there is in the western world. These select group of peopel had been reuniting yearly there for around 30 years and all of them had been doign the work with this amazing genius.

What did I find that strucked me? No one had it all toguether. No one was perfect nor were they trying. They were though human. They were sharing and putting in the center their truth, their vulnerability, they were asking to be held and accepting the places were they were struggling to let anyone in.

The were human. Profoundly human. I realized then and there that was what I could aspire for. That was all of what I could honestly aspire for. And that was way more than enough.

We are so well made.